Letter to Editor
MY heart felt shattered into a million pieces when I read the news with the headline “Old folk’s home owner had their residents chained to their beds at a run-down place”.
I am certain that your heart felt the pain as well. This incident made it crystal clear where our country sits on the path to transforming its eldercare practice.
Our pain is multifaceted – it is not just about the shocking incident that pales in comparison to the realisation we have the heart to treat another human who is frail and vulnerable, who needs our protection in such an inhumane manner.
If being a vulnerable old person means suffering abandonment, hurt humiliation, and abuse, then this is not merely a geriatric problem.
It is the disproof of our shaky pudding, technology, science, medical advancement, and all. Recently, we have had increasing reports of elder abuse, which may give rise to a new pandemic that may reach deeply into the fabric and soul of our society.
Our traditional respect and care for our ageing population are dissolving into a growing incidence of neglect and abuse.
I find myself at a loss, searching for explanations to the young people I am mentoring for why kindness, respect, and empathy seem to be losing ground in this country they are living in.
Irony doesn’t begin to cover it. How do I help them understand that, despite all our progress, we’re still held back by this glaring hypocrisy? How do we expect the young to respect us when we are old, frail, and need their support?
One of my favourite Chinese stories succinctly points this out. It tells of an old woman who’s too weak to work in the field or help with household chores. She just sits on the porch, gazing out across the fields, while her son toils the soil and farm.
One day, the son looks up at the old woman and thinks, “What good is she now that she’s so old? All she does is eat up the food! I have my family to think about. It’s time for her to be done with life!”
He then makes a big wooden box, places it on a wheelbarrow, rolls it up to the porch, and asks his mother to get in. The mother lies down in the box and the son puts the cover on, then wheels it toward the cliff.
At the edge of the cliff, there was a knock from the box. “Yes, mother?” the son asks. The mother replies, “Why don’t you just throw me off the cliff and save the box? Your children are going to need it one day.”
Honestly, elder abuse reflects a decay of basic human rights in a major segment of our society. How do we move forward? It starts with us.
“The transformation doesn’t begin with the institution. We don’t organize to transform the universe. We don’t get a God squad together to do it. We start with the individual human heart. We start right here inside ourselves.” (Ram Dass, Richard Alpert) – Nov 11, 2024
Dr Cecilia Chan
Penang
The views expressed are solely of the author and do not necessarily reflect those of Focus Malaysia.
