NONE of us are strangers to the concept of cyberbullying in these digitised times, but yet, answers to questions such as how cyberbullying affects the people on the receiving end of it and what are the possible solutions to the problem continue to elude us.
This was the subject of a recent Clubhouse discussion organised by the Communications and Multimedia Content Forum of Malaysia (or in short, the Content Forum) titled “Cyberbullying: They asked for it”.
Featuring Ain Husniza Saiful Nizam, TV host and singer Hunny Madu and radio announcer Hafiz Hatim, the session was a no-holds-barred conversation about dealing with toxicity online.
Teaching children to stay safe online
Sharing her experience of online gaming communities, student advocate Ain said that children were particularly vulnerable to abuse – from both predatory adults, as well as their own peers.
“Children are innocent; they go online thinking that they just want to make friends but there are people who will take advantage of that. I’ve received unsolicited pictures myself…and I have had friends as young as 11 being asked to send their own pictures to people,” she said.
Ain added that what her parents taught her about staying safe online from a young age had prepared her and protected her from online harassment to an extent.
However, even she was not prepared for the amount of abuse that would be levelled at her when she chose to publicly speak up against a rape joke made by her teacher recently.
“I was shocked because people weren’t just attacking me over the issue itself, but they were making character assassinations – my personality, my body, just attacking me for being myself.
“There was a Facebook group of more than 100,000 teachers, discussing my case once it went viral – the comments really shocked me. They were body-shaming me, making comments about my body and sexualising me.
“It really shone a light on how some Malaysians are acting online,” she said.
The struggle to “be yourself” on social media
Meanwhile, celebrity TV host Hunny Madu spoke about the pressure public figures face in trying to maintain a dual identity, expressing that this was especially so for women.
While remarking that some celebrities may choose to minimise judgement from the public by holding back their personality on social media, Hunny found it best to be herself.
“I used to do a lot of hosting for TV and I was hosting a serious talk show, so my image was always about respecting the market.
“But it wasn’t the real me so I felt like I had a curtain over a fragment of my life. When I started working out, I realised I was comfortable with who I am – whatever I showed on Instagram is who you will see in real life.
“When I grasped that concept, I realised I’ve got nothing to hide. Take me as I am, I don’t want to hide anymore. I believe it’s about owning yourself, finding your power and being comfortable with yourself, if you want to be a public figure,” she opined.
Speaking from his perspective as a father, radio announcer Hafiz joked that he would never let his daughter have social media if he could but that would not be fair or feasible.
“Frankly, the best thing I can do is monitor what she watches, guide and educate her. It boils down to parents sharing with their children about the potential threats that are out there.
“It’s all about our relationship with our kids and how open we are with them about all this,” he remarked.
Making online spaces safer and accessible to all
All three guests also shared that the pile-on of hatred and negative comments from hundreds of strangers online can be overwhelming.
Commenting on the nature of ‘cancel culture’ for instance, Hafiz said that it was not right for people to gang up on someone for one mistake on social media, going to the extent of demanding that they be fired.
“Sometimes people don’t understand the full context of a matter, but they’ll just jump on the bandwagon. And I’m thinking: do we really want someone to get fired because of a TikTok video they made?” he added.
Ultimately, the end goal is to find ways to make online spaces safer and accessible to all.
“Everybody has the right to use the internet and feel safe while using the internet. But I have experienced more abuse online than I have ever done in real life.
“The internet is becoming more and more integral to our lives and we need a better approach to this problem rather than invalidating victims by telling them to just shut down the computer,” Ain pointed out. – Nov 1, 2021
Photo credit: Kids Helpline
